With your big day coming up, you and your spouse-to-be may writing your own vows. When you sit down to get going, you might start to feel overwhelmed. You want your vows to be memorable and heartfelt. You might think, “How can I possibly say everything in just a few lines?” The good news is that you don’t have to! You can’t possibly include every thought and feeling in them, so it’s perfectly fine to touch on the highlights. Here are our tips on writing your vows so they fully express exactly what you want to say on your wedding day.

  1. Start Early: It’s so easy to get wrapped up in wedding planning—the caterer, the venue, the DJ, the bridesmaids’ dresses—that your vows get back seated. Writing them last minute puts more pressure on you, and when you’re in a rush, you’re likely to leave things out that you wish you hadn’t. Make them a priority over the course of a few weekends so you can fully map out what you want to say.
  2. Draft Them: The first step is to brainstorm. Grab a notebook and start writing things down. What are you excited about for your marriage? How did the two of you meet? What’s something that you treasure about your partner? What promises would you like to make to them? Once you have some material to work with, begin a draft. It doesn’t have to be beautifully written and edited just yet. Just parse out your general ideas and how you want your vows to sound. You can make a second or even a third draft over time, so you have two or three options to splice together.
  3. Draw on Things That Inspire You: Most have that special quote from a film, song, novel, or somewhere else that they apply to their relationship. If this could add sentiment to your vows and help express your feelings, add it in. It could act as your opening line or a piece of your closing.
  4. Note Pauses: This is key for any piece that will be read aloud. Denote places that you need to pause so you aren’t rushing through it. You may not be an avid public speaker, and that’s okay! You can literally write out PAUSE between paragraphs, so you know to take a breath. This will help you nail the emotion of your vows as well.
  5. Make Your Vows Personal: Although others will be listening to them, your vows should be all your own. Don’t worry about what your guests or family think. We guarantee no one will consider your vows cheesy should you get very sentimental. After all, this is YOUR wedding! Make it as emotional or funny as you’d like.

When you prioritize your wedding vows, you’ll be able to organize your thoughts and feelings so drafting feels easier. You have a lot on your plate before the wedding, so get your vows checked off the to-do list early so they express exactly how you feel about your partner and marriage